The "don't confuse me with the facts" syndrome

Where's Detective Joe Friday when we really need him?

Okay, I’ll admit it, I used to like to watch the old TV show “Dragnet”. Sure, as an actor, Jack Webb was dry and deadpan in his character as Detective Joe Friday. And yes, the shows were unrealistic in a portrayal that all cases were open-and-shut, with the police always tracking down and nabbing the unquestionably guilty, bad guys.

But then again, Detective Friday’s ability to lay things out in a straight forward, orderly, and logical manner was enviable, understandable, and made perfect sense. In fact, even when a witness strayed off track and started speculating, he’d use his “Mr. Spock”-like persona and reel them back in with a reminder that, “All we want are the facts, ma’am.” [which later on was misquoted by the media and tagged as the punchline, “just the facts, ma’am”].

But regardless of the exact wording of the “facts” phrase, my plea is still the same: Joe, where are you today when we really need you?

I raise this point, because in reading the news and following the media these days, it is more like a hide-and-seek or “Where’s Waldo?” with the facts. We know that they are out there somewhere, but unfortunately, they are hidden deep in cracks and crevices, parked in between opinions, half-truths, and outright falsehoods. Today’s speeches, campaigns, promotions, and lectures are so riddled with inaccuracies that it’s helped launch a whole new industry, i.e., fact-checking.

Come to think of it, why do we need facts anyway? The existence of hard truths just makes the task of putting together a logical argument that much harder. Besides, wouldn’t it be nice not to be tethered down to reality by the facts?

By the looks of it, our politicians, social leaders, and the media haven't been burdened by any type of moral duty to apply logic, rationality, and/or good common sense to the situation. They seem to freely motor down the road on their preordained path, throwing facts and reality aside like trash on the highway, when/if considered an obstacle or deterrent to their objective.

But alas, not all of us are so lucky. Unfortunately, operating in the field of business, and in particular, the specialty area of finance, I’ve always found it hard to avoid reality. In the world of numbers and debits/credits, facts hit hard and on point, like solid little hail pellets in a rain storm. But to their credit, the facts do keep us on course, ensuring that the needle constantly points “North”.

Besides, in accounting and finance I’m not sure that we want our trusted professionals using complete literary license. When dealing with real numbers, if you stray too far from the barriers of reality and start grazing around in the vast and plentiful fields of unbridled creativity, you can end up with an Enron or Bernie Madoff on your hands. And come to think of it, neither of those ended too well, did they?

Let’s face it, facts are the key ingredients that produce wise decisions and good judgment. And the more facts and truthful nuggets that can be harvested, the more accurate the outcome. Just ask any good doctor or judge – the more one knows, the better the diagnosis/verdict.

So, are my expectations too high? When I read articles, watch megalomaniacs pontificate in the media, or just deal with day-to-day issues in my own little world, I harken back to the words of my hero, Detective Joe Friday, and make this simple statement/request (sans any particular gender reference): “all we want are the facts, ma’am.” From there I’m very capable of drawing my own conclusions and making wise decisions, thank you very much. And I'm sure there's many of you out there that feel the same way.